I recently introduced you to the voices in my head, the Mindful Monkey, Picky, my inner critic, and Baby Girl, my inner child. I recommended that you get to know your voices. Name them, look at their themes, their concerns, their anxieties. During meditation, listen. Who’s talking? What’s the message and its source? Become interested in what is going on in your head.
When you feel comfortable with your inner voices, you can begin helping them calm down. They will never stop talking, but they can learn patience. Let’s look at a three-step process to help them to control themselves.
1) Acknowledge Them without Judgement
Know their voices and acknowledge them. Never push them away, ignore them, or act like you don’t hear them. Acknowledge their views with acceptance and understanding. In meditation, witness your voices’ thoughts, feelings, and emotions without judgment.
2) Show Them Gratitude
Thank them for their information. Appreciate the reminder, the critique or the warning. As you become aware of your voices’ intentions and themes, you can thank them with genuine gratitude. Say “Thank you” and mean it.
3) Watch Them Walk Away
Clearly see their backsides. My monkey drags his tail in the dust; Picky Inner Critic clicks away on pointy high-heels, the baby tottles away on uncertain feet. As they walk away, I focus on my breath and return to meditation. I let go and breath.
Pema Chodron, a Buddhist nun and prolific writer on meditation, teaches that meditation is the moment of returning. The instant you return to your breath, you meditate. The second you return to your inner knowing, you meditate. That moment of coming back to yourself – open and accepting of everything – you meditate. At the beginning of your meditation practice, you find yourself coming back every few seconds. As your meditation practice develops, you find yourself coming back every few minutes. Coming back is a process; it is the practice; it is meditation.
Listen to the voices, acknowledge them, thank them, allow them to walk away.
Breathe.
Be Still and Know.